I thought that I had gotten over so-called “imposter syndrome,” in which a person feels like a fraud, poorly qualified to do the things they’re doing (or want to do).

I remember when I could not — could not — create a website for my music. It felt totally phony to write a third-person bio (“Casey is a singer-songwriter who labors in obscurity…”) and when I went to write a first-person bio instead, I shut down completely. Years later, I felt grateful not to be there anymore. I could now start things and follow through on them. I could do the work that needed to be done (including writing bios) easily and without angst.

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I’ve been teaching some online songwriting classes for kids.

It’s been a lot of fun. We’re making up silly lyrics about tacos and learning to jam a little bit.

These kids have varying levels of participation. Some of them are all in, chanting rhythms and offering little bits of melody. Some will sing along when they’re on mute but refuse to turn on their mics to share what they are doing. Some will propose some lyrics or answer questions in the chat. And some won’t contribute at all — their participation is limited to observation.

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A friend of mine was struggling with a new skill.

She confessed that she was “not really cut out for it.”

Regardless of her actual ability, this statement limited her results. It was a convenient place to hide.

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Something had finally clicked for a student of mine.

Trying to find the side length of a square with a perimeter of 56, she said, “I just don't understand how I would get the answer by dividing and getting one number and know that the other three are the same.”

It wasn’t that she understood the concept of division. It was that she was able to articulate clearly what she didn’t understand.

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As a musician, I’ve learned to buff and polish a piece to a high level of shine. However, I also really enjoy being spontaneous. Whether that’s taking a request in a live performance or improvising with other musicians, there’s something to be said for the high wire act of trying something new and creative. 

I miscalculated gravely in a recent performance. I was singing a new composition that I had never performed before. In fact, it was so new that I completely forgot how it went in the middle of performing it. Luckily, the crowd was forgiving. 

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“Yesterday, she sat at the piano and cried,” said Angie about her nine-year-old, “and today she’s refusing to play.”

It didn’t take much to soothe Angie, despite how dire the situation seemed. I told her that I’ve cried at the piano bench many a time. It’s normal. It doesn’t mean that her daughter has had enough and should quit piano. On the contrary, it means that she really cares about what she’s doing and a breakthrough is on its way if she sticks with it.

Do we want a child to feel this level of frustration in their first six months of piano lessons? Of course not. But Angie’s daughter had been playing for more than three years. She was an accomplished player for her age who was setting big goals for herself.

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