Recently, I had a doctor’s appointment to go to in another city because we live at the edge of the earth.

In preparation for this three-hour round trip, I took my car to the shop.

The mechanic came back with a list of codes so long that he didn’t bother to check all of them. “This car is not safe to drive,” he said. And the implication was that it wasn’t worth fixing.

Catching up with TikTok friends on a Sunday morning, I was intrigued by a tag on a new acquaintance’s post: #skoolie.

Clicking on it, I found myself in a world of people who are taking #vanlife to the next level by converting old school buses into tiny homes and using them to explore the country.

I don’t think I’ll ever be one of them — driving is one of my least favorite activities. But I watched several videos and enjoyed them for a number of reasons.

One of the things you learn as a teacher is to hold back.

You can’t share everything you know, no matter how willing the student is. You have to slowly drip out the information over time. It’s even better when you can structure the student’s learning such that they are taking actions that lead to growth and insight without you having to explain anything.

For a student who is hesitant or uncomfortable, giving them everything you’ve got will be overwhelming and frustrating. You serve them better when you do less and give less.

Or maybe it is. How can you know for sure?

Increasingly, I’m noticing that a key role that I have in my clients’ lives is to be a filter.

Based on knowing them, their strengths, and their desired outcomes, I’m helping them to figure out which voices to listen to, what frameworks apply to them, and which advice to take.