“You know,” she said, her ponytail whipping around as she turned to face me, “you don’t have to raise your hand to answer every question.”

Eleven-year-old me didn’t have anything much to say in response to that. I had been confused and disoriented by the worldview of this newly-arrived student who wore nothing but embroidered velour sweatsuits with false collars and seemed intent on competing with me. This was just more of the same.

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In my work with adolescents, I like to remind them that they are active participants in creating the kind of culture they want to be part of.

"I'm only able to get up in front of the room and speak," I once told them, "because you're allowing me to. "If you all started jumping up and down and screaming, there wouldn't be much I could do about it."

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It was a moment that will surely be familiar to anyone who survived middle school.

My students and I were playing and singing a song together when one voice rang out a little louder than the rest. Exuberant and enthusiastic though it was, it was imperfect. No problem in our group — we’re all learning. We’re constantly talking about how we can all grow and improve as musicians, and how it’s an act of leadership to put in the effort.

But not all of us were in agreement on this point, apparently. Two eighth grade girls, sitting idly instead of participating in the music, exchanged a glance. Its meaning was unmistakeable — they were silently making fun of the earnestness of the confident singer.

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This week, author Emily Giffin (who just happens to have a book coming out) told the AP that her comments last month about Meghan Markle were “mean” and that she “need[s] to be more careful about the impact of [her] words.”

Back in May, Giffin called Markle phony and unmaternal, picking apart (apparently with friends) a short video of Markle and her son reading together. She even criticized the choice to allow the baby to appear on video in a onesie. However, she was quick to assert that her comments weren’t racist.

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Last Thursday, Good Morning America did a quick segment about Prince George’s activities. Host Lara Spencer, encouraged by a laughing audience and co-host, used a mocking tone when she mentioned that George is taking ballet classes. She implied that the child’s enthusiasm for dance will not last.

I watched the segment, which has been shared widely by appropriately outraged people, with a mix of revulsion and dismay. First of all, why are adults even talking about a child’s activities on national television? I understand that the British royal family is fascinating to many, but surely we can find things to discuss other than a six-year-old.

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