How do you measure success?
It’s nice when our work goes smoothly. It’s especially satisfying when we can point to our output: “I wrote these ten pages/folded these three loads of laundry/finally won the battle royale.”
But sometimes, it’s not that clear-cut. We brainstorm for an hour but none of the ideas quite click. We exercise and eat right for an entire week and our clothes fit the same. We spend half a day waiting at the doctor’s office for an appointment that resolves nothing.
If our measurement of success (or our worth as a person) is bound up in productivity, these circumstances are painful. We have no way to feel okay. We might berate ourselves for being weak and stupid — or lash out at circumstances or other people for holding us back or ruining our day.
There are other ways we can look at the value of our days, though. A few:
How joyful did I feel?
Where did I help others in a meaningful way?
How deeply did I connect with a power greater than myself?
How many moments did I spend feeling fully present?
How grateful did I feel to be alive?
How many opportunities for growth did I have, and did I make the most of them?
How deeply was I able to feel compassion for myself and others?
To what extent was I able to develop and make use of my unique combination of talents in order to contribute to the world and fulfill my highest calling?
“Rulerless” doesn’t mean that we don’t measure anything, ever. Rather, it’s a call to throw away standardized units of measurement and focus on personal ones that will be most useful in living the kind of life we want.
My uncle says, “There is no valid objective measurement of a human life.”
You can feel free to disagree — that’s the point. Do what works for you. If you’re miserable, try something else.
“Rulerless” also means that there’s no one to answer to — you get to decide.